How to choose a counsellor, when there so many to choose from!
Making the decision to open up to a stranger about your most inner thoughts and feelings its hard enough, next comes ‘how on earth do I choose from so many?’
I am going to guide you through a step by step guide of how I choose a counsellor – and yes, therapists need therapy too, so as you can imagine we are quite picky.
So, make yourself a cuppa, give yourself some time and let’s get choosing.
Lets narrow the list down a bit
Find a therapist near you, or online. You can search by postcode or therapy.
Work out how much you can afford for weekly sessions.
Read through their profiles and get a feeling for what they offer from a professional stand point – but also if you get a feel for their personality.
Opening up is not the easiest of things, so go for the ones that give you a good instant gut feeling.
Know what you want
You are probably not even sure on what you are looking for or need, so I am going to help break it down:
Do you want a quick fix?
Do you want to learn tools that you can put into action when, say anxiety grips you?
Do you feel that something from your past is impacting your present day issue and you want to explore that?
Do you feel lost? Be it career, relationship, home life, empty nest, menopause, health – are you asking yourself what do I really want in life?
Do you want the space and time to be fully heard and to work on your own self?
Know what they are offering
With so much choice and so many therapies to choose from, here is a short breakdown of what the differences ares.
The approach focuses on the relationship between the client and counsellor, the exploring together of your own truths and the belief that you have the ability to to find your happier life.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
Goal driven short-term therapy only looking at present issues.
Neuro-Linguistic Therapy (NLP)
A psychological approach, working with language and patterns, it involves dynamic techniques that are quick, easy, and can enable you to change unwanted behaviours and remove unnecessary stress and anxiety.
Thought Field Therapy (TFT)
TFT is a tapping technique when applied to problems it helps to eliminate blocks and psychological barriers.
Is what is says on the tin… a combined approach of therapies, that bring together different elements of specific therapies.
I am an integrative counsellor using:
- Humanistic Therapy
- Neuro-Linguistic Therapy (NLP)
- Thought Field Therapy (TFT)
Research proves the most important factor in the success of your therapy is actually the relationship you build with your therapist.
Most counsellors offer a free phone consultation. This is great, it gives you a chance to ask questions, discuss your needs, also what you want to achieve, ask how they work, see if you warm to them over the phone.
Feeling comfortable, safe and supported is vital if you are going to move forward and tackle the painful stuff.
Trusting your gut instinct is vital, if you warm to counsellor – great! If you don’t, call some more.
Who would I choose?
So after going through the process above, I would sit down and contact a few counsellors, ask them if they have experience of working with X and how do they work. I’d have my first 15 min chat with them and make my decision based upon who I warmed to most and why.
Please do remember this is your therapy, for you. I look at therapy as a treat for myself, it has to feel right. If the counsellor isn’t a good fit for me, I move on. My thoughts and feelings are precious – they need to be in safe hands.
Please do contact me to see if we would be a good fit for each other.